Third Day Back.

I am so tired... With slow or no internet connection (and firewall blocks), progress has been slow and so I carry my tasks back with me to the cottage. I'm under 1.5 hours of sleep right now...there are several time constraints I have in this brief visit so I told BTM that today and tomorrow is what I consider "CRUNCH TIME."

I am pleased with the published pieces over the summer. Here are two images. I'll bring some copies home. Looks like some more of my other pieces are heading to the printers soon (the were recently approved):

2006 Narrative Report was a word document. This is a vast improvement!

simplifying their data so everyone understands the course of web hits

Second Day back.

This visit to Africa is very different – I am living alone and a bit more stressed. Don't get me wrong, for the one full day that I have been here it has been mostly pleasant. But really, since my time here is so terribly brief most of the days will be busy with work and only work. Every day is so timed and carefully scheduled that there really is no time for leisure. I'm having internet difficulties so with 99 percent of my tasks being web-related...this is adding on extreme frustration.

Yesterday evening I went to a lounge call House of Nsako, a neighborhood hotspot that many cultural and international students like to hang out…even some celebrities (South Africa celebrities aren’t a big deal here…my friends say one sees them so frequently that just blend in very well). They were showing Obama's inauguration ceremony on three projections. After the ceremony finished, a live band played some contemporary live jazz. It was hard going to bed...just kept thinking about what I had to do the next day.

Oh, and I'm being blocked from our parsons server, prolonging trial and error testing.

Doris back in South Africa

Never thought I would be back so soon, but I am.

However, it has already been very emotional. Within the first two hours, I found out a dear friend of mine was diagnosed with HIV a couple of months ago. He was a Zimbabwean refugee and returned to his country to be with his family. They say grew very thin, weak, and eventually incapable of doing his work. Neighbors say they are unsure how much longer he has to live. He is only 30-something years old and his wife was someone I also befriended. He was not part of the organization but helped us with maintenance around the summerhouse. Since he left, no one really knows of his condition.

While anticipating a reunion with my South African comrades, I can’t help but think of all the work that needs to be done. I only have a total of four regular business days to get a bulk of it done. I’m hoping the office will open on Saturday. With an extra day, I’d be allowed more time to accomplish everything on this list. The purpose of this revisit is to clean up some loose ends and follow up with my NGO about what happened after our initial visit. What was the impact we made? How we can extend the impact into a foreseeable future? Specifically, this is what I have scheduled:

- Meeting with PCB to migrate and configure Drupal CMS onto their server
- Capture testimonies after the Parsons fellowship
- Visit, participate, and document any LGBTI events that may be scheduled
- Collect release forms from staff and all individuals previously photographed
- Pull quotes from current staff (some old members left but may try to send them an email survey)

I asked Thuli to sit with me this morning about how the organization is doing. Because of other challenges, they are really stressed right now. And let me just tell you, working with stressed people makes you even more stressed than you already are…I’m going to try my best to bring some smiles this week. Thuli (director) is out basically everyday and I'll only see her on Friday. The managing editor will not be here this week and the secretary is gone today. I'll be working with Stanley ("webmaster") most of the time.

This evening there will be a large Obama celebration at a neighborhood lounge not too far away that normally congregates those who are poetically, politically, and culturally open-minded. My landlord and neighbors will be taking me there as a welcome back to the American girl.

I’m not staying in the same summerhouse Joe and I lived in but my own private cottage that shares a courtyard with it. It’s very quaint but equipped with fewer things. There’s no stove or burners so personal cooking is not really an option (there is a microwave). No washer and no cleaning supplies. I’m sure I can borrow stuff from Mongezi, who lives in the private cottage neighboring mine. But there are restaurants nearby and dried foods can suffice for this short visit. If I buy soap, all I need is a rock to scrub any dirty laundry at the end of the week.

[ thank you, south africa ]

My Dear South African Friend,
Thank you for the gift you have given me. While it may not be worth much when you measure this woven basket in rands or dollars, it is of great value. In your words, you said: "I don't have much money but I want to give you the thing I cherish the most." And to this - how it was presented to me - I shall always treasure this token forever. Your name will not be disclosed for you fear family will discover you on the net, and that you've been secretly working for an LGBTI organization.


You are one amongst many South African daughters and sons who cannot open up to mom and dad about your sexual orientation. For that, you have remained silenced and ashamed - you told me you will not get married, even though South Africa legalizes same-sex marriages. You told me because you were raised Christian, you were told you could never marry of the same kind. But dear sir, we are each individuals. Do not deny who you are. Your pregnant mother gave you this woven basket, right? You told me she is the one who would disown you. You fear she would become ill if she were to find out you were gay. You fear something will happen to your unborn baby brother. You are too sweet as to think about her condition. Oh dear friend, a loyal son you are as well. But i'll always keep this basket open, hoping one day you'll come out and stop hiding. Thank you for the gift.


Sincerely,

Doris Yee

[ last day onsite ]

Small chats about returning to Johannesburg at a future date to possibly continue onsite work for Behind the Mask have been in the air. Also, there is possibly another developing city project I was introduced to recently (somewhat connected to Constitution Hill) that has intrigued me and possibly well worth the time to keep networking with those external contacts. I'll be in close communication with my NGO - not only for the project tasks already on the agenda, but you never know...they may see me sooner than later.

L to R: Mashilo, Apinda, Thuli, Musa (behind), Jabu, Stanley, Mongezi, Nthateng

Behind the Mask (mising Abeli and minus DK in front...she's from FEW)

Today is the last day doing onsite work for Behind the Mask. It has been a wonderful exchange of our two cultures over the last couple of months and it's a shame time flew by so quickly. I made sure I took some group photos of the organization because they haven't had one since 2005. We got some fun ones in there as well...the only missing puzzle piece was Mr. Mauriello. But we can photoshop you in somewhere.

I fly out tomorrow 07:00 in the evening. Will return to America on Sunday morning.

[ standstill ]

Joe is across the Atlantic now. I'm still here on dry ground. Making a list of things to do while I still can but, sadly, there's just not enough time in the day. Projects, in my opinion, are somewhat at a standstill (not drupal site - fellows get to call 99% of the shots on that one). I've been waiting for confirmations, answers, and materials from internal and external sources for a few days now. it started off a bit frustrating to very frustrating. However, I've dealt with small-teams of grassroots and non-profits before - this type of break in the progression is typical. I was hoping it wouldn't last as long as it has but I've managed to do some other small tasks while in the office. We were hoping to launch some of the near-to-finalized items before I leave, but my gut tells me with the continuation of slow responses and actions, it's not possible.

While I couldn't eat what was braai-ing, looks like Pefo knew what she was doing.

I really enjoy having "Mo" as a roommate. With Mauriello gone, it's just the two of us in this house on top of the hill. He's given me a very youthful but scared perspective on the South African LGBTI community - particularly along the lines of a younger-generation battling with the fears of "coming out" and the public risk of being proactive in the gay and lesbian civil rights movement. We sat in my bedroom last night talking about what he has seen, what he has heard, what's working forward and backward, and lastly a personal outlook on the country and his future. Some individual video interviews were not conducted in the office because of the very fears he has - about being "discovered." I respect this decision.

[ hamba kahle, manqoba ]

Mauriello will begin his journey back home this evening. It has been a pleasure experiencing South Africa with him and I'm very grateful he was here. Otherwise, who else would have been my bodyguard? "Hamba kahle, Manqoba." Go well and safely, Joe. See you in New York City.

[ behind the scenes diary ]

A fun side-project Joe and I have been doing is documenting ourselves here in Joburg (this is different from the recording of BTM members). It's quite amateur - in other words, very random. It's a compilation of discussions snippets about anything from foods, cockroaches, animals, load shedding to how Mauriello and I managed to live with one another as complete opposites. I'll be sure to show all of you when we get back. Too bad the Joburg team don't know or even own final cut pro. While pieced together in your simple iMovie, it's hilarious.

Stillframe: One week in.

Stillframe: One week in.

Stillframe: Four weeks in.

Stillframe: Four weeks in.

Stillframe: Six weeks in.

Stillframe: Seven weeks in.

[ braai! ]

Even though I'm not leaving for another week, Behind the Mask is throwing a braai (aka barbeque) as a farewell to the "Bonnie and Clyde" team. They've invited others from neighboring organizations that Joe and I have met. I don't really know how big this thing will be but hopefully there will be something I can eat, since meat is no option for me.

[ from the eye of thuli ]

Status: Busy. (I have my do-not-disturb face on)
Thuli calls the below images: Doris-in-action and Joe-in-action.

Doris taking a photo next to South African Police
(who really aren't taken the protest seriously).

Mauriello never wants people to know he's taken their photo.

[ cleaning up dirty design ]

New challenge: Re-edit and re-design a 35-40-page Annual News Magazine in 1.5 weeks.
Behind the Mask needs to quickly reproduce this publication and are taking advantage of the time that Joe and I have left here. This piece was designed by outside sources and the final result was completely unacceptable. And so, it's been passed down to us to clean up the mess. Already it's a headache, I just hope that by the end we're still alive. Here's a video of yesterday's Soweto Gay Pride March: Vimeo !t.

[ mountains, horses, gay pride ]

Click Above for Saturday Photos in Magaliesberg + Hartbeespoort Dam.

Click Above for Sunday Photos in Bela Bela and Mabula.

Click Above for Monday and Soweto Gay Pride March.

[ sneak preview ]

What: Annual Narrative Report 2007
Status: Being proofed by contacts in ZA an NL, still receiving content from some sponsors (why it remains as a draft)
Size: 90.5 MB
Total Page Count: 35
Design: Original photography and layout by Doris Yee
Description: Each chapter is a color of the rainbow. The cover was desired to be the crimson yellow image so where it would typically pop in the color sequence is replaced with this steel photograph I stylized. It throws off the rainbow but the rest is at least consistent. There is still content flowing in from external funders so there are currently some placeholders in the below compressed thumbnails. These are just chapter spreads, obviously with other pages that populate each section. Color seems to be off when making them web-viewable but color palette of the real thing is much more vibrant. Somewhat like a Pantone booklet. Some data visualizations representing bandwidth usage, web site statistics, and financial audit were also made to be included in the final piece. I believe last year's annual report existed as a word document.

[ office prop ]

Man-haters?

[ 07 07 07 ]

Sitting alone today in the "shop", where the 07-07-07 campaign members organize their advocacy and media communications. Some of the most dedicated feminists are situated in here but currently on retreat for the day. We needed to make space for someone in the media room and I volunteered to work in this cold, cold and quiet room. Hopefully it's not haunted like most other sectors of this facility.

Today is spent drupaling and making data visualizations for the 2007 audit report.
In the "shop" by myself.

07-07-07 formed as a reaction to the murder of Sigasa and Massoa and named after the date of their killing (July 7, 2007). Together, members raise awareness among South African leaders and local communities about unfair violations on the LGBTI community.

Sigasa and Masooa's bodies were discovered by a jogger in a field in Meadowlands, Soweto, on Sunday 8 July. According to various reports, the couple, who were romantically involved, had been tortured, and possibly raped, before they were shot dead. No arrests have yet been made.

[ soweto + religion ]

This weekend sure was something. While hate crimes towards those within the LGBTI community is a major problem in Johannesburg, most of it occurs within a certain demography - the South African township. Referencing from the testimonies I've recorded of my coworkers, the words of gay and lesbian belong to this foreign terminology throughout a child's upbringing that was neither used or permitted for practice. In townships, it was just assumed you would marry the opposite sex. The Christian church plays a heavy role in these townships - as we have heard, seen, and visited this weekend in Soweto. In fact, Joe and I were noticed in the first church we visited, taken by the hand, brought forth in front of this 100-person audience, introduced, and inducted into the Methodist society with the entire service as our witness. I was so shocked about how quickly we got sucked into the institution. They even sang a Zulu song to us. Yes, the church (if not the most important player) than the second vital asset to keep up in the game. If you're not playing by the church's rules, you'll face the penalties.

Methodist Church members who welcomed with open arms and song.

Kids at play in Soweto streets.

Hanging outside house that is guarded by cheaper fencing.

In solitude.

Solution for the one-woman heavy-load carrier.

Looking dry, maybe feeling dry.

Using resources, being smart. Fence made out of cars.

These kids told me that they love bologna.

Occupied shop.

With Granny.

These boys were cleaning up a littered field in order to make their own soccer field.

Going home.

Coal burns for a "warmer" evening.

In Soweto we were, from morning to near sunset. It's by far the most beautiful place in all of Johannesburg - every pedestrian greets you with a smile. No child will run away from you but actually ride up to you on their old bike and want to shake your hand. Even with shacks as homes and the poor reputation, these people still have lots to be happy about.

I have three more weeks - I'm completely saddened by it. Wish I could stay longer.

[ grim day ]

STRIKE. Street closures and large-scale disruptions have been occurring on the way going home. Public servants and Congress of South African Trade Unions are protesting. Waiting in traffic, I took some photos from the back seat:

[ the walk in the dark ]

It's only when this place begins to feel like home that I realize I will be leaving it in three weeks. But we've been told this time around, us Americans needed to learn the way of life here, adjust and feel comfortable with it. Around the one-month mark, I decided to take a walk outside by myself during the evening, fetching some apples for Joe and me. Yes, it's not the smartest thing to do. As Joe says it, " I refuse to be a prisoner in my own home!" We hear it over-and-over again, Johannesburg is not a safe place, especially for a someone who doesn't look like they are from around here. Asian, female, short, and no bulging biceps. Joe can pass for any white South African. Lucky duck.

Night shots and a fast shutter are for Joburg photography.

It was fine. But yes, I won't walk alone again in the dark. On the way back home, the entire neighborhood experienced a load shed. I got to watch the lights shut off house-to-house, lamp-to-lamp. It went from dark to nothing. Just to be safe, I ran the rest of the way with my apples.

[ where are my female condoms ]

Even in an organization where a majority of the staff identify themselves as lesbian, the men still get special treatment...

I find it hilarious we only supply condoms in the male washroom at BTM
and there are no female condoms in the women's lou.

It's been a shared opinions by many in the office that a black South African lesbian
is targeted more for discrimination than a black South African gay man.

[ disgrace to the nation ]

Dirty politicians just don't make sense. I wonder if they even understand themselves. Projects are still rolling. Roger out.