[ thank you, south africa ]

My Dear South African Friend,
Thank you for the gift you have given me. While it may not be worth much when you measure this woven basket in rands or dollars, it is of great value. In your words, you said: "I don't have much money but I want to give you the thing I cherish the most." And to this - how it was presented to me - I shall always treasure this token forever. Your name will not be disclosed for you fear family will discover you on the net, and that you've been secretly working for an LGBTI organization.


You are one amongst many South African daughters and sons who cannot open up to mom and dad about your sexual orientation. For that, you have remained silenced and ashamed - you told me you will not get married, even though South Africa legalizes same-sex marriages. You told me because you were raised Christian, you were told you could never marry of the same kind. But dear sir, we are each individuals. Do not deny who you are. Your pregnant mother gave you this woven basket, right? You told me she is the one who would disown you. You fear she would become ill if she were to find out you were gay. You fear something will happen to your unborn baby brother. You are too sweet as to think about her condition. Oh dear friend, a loyal son you are as well. But i'll always keep this basket open, hoping one day you'll come out and stop hiding. Thank you for the gift.


Sincerely,

Doris Yee

I'm going home!

I'm so excited to go home. I've enjoyed my stay here, but there have been a mess of politics and I'm lonesome for home!

While here, I've been able to complete:
- main brochure
- main poster
- newsletter templates
- mock ups for entire website
- education/training catalog
- conference material templates
- e-blast draft

My wrap up items include:
- assistance with website implementation
- newsletter support
- e-blast support
- posters, brochure

I'll be home on Friday!

[ last day onsite ]

Small chats about returning to Johannesburg at a future date to possibly continue onsite work for Behind the Mask have been in the air. Also, there is possibly another developing city project I was introduced to recently (somewhat connected to Constitution Hill) that has intrigued me and possibly well worth the time to keep networking with those external contacts. I'll be in close communication with my NGO - not only for the project tasks already on the agenda, but you never know...they may see me sooner than later.

L to R: Mashilo, Apinda, Thuli, Musa (behind), Jabu, Stanley, Mongezi, Nthateng

Behind the Mask (mising Abeli and minus DK in front...she's from FEW)

Today is the last day doing onsite work for Behind the Mask. It has been a wonderful exchange of our two cultures over the last couple of months and it's a shame time flew by so quickly. I made sure I took some group photos of the organization because they haven't had one since 2005. We got some fun ones in there as well...the only missing puzzle piece was Mr. Mauriello. But we can photoshop you in somewhere.

I fly out tomorrow 07:00 in the evening. Will return to America on Sunday morning.

Designing in Power Point

My NGO does not have any design software. The webmaster has Dreamweaver. I am seriously ashamed.

I've been designing in Illustrator and translating my designs into PowerPoint so that my work can be continued after I leave.

I have 8 more days and I am super anxious to get home!

I will post my progress report soon. Take care, everyone!

Continuing work in New York for MHS

I introduced you to Nurbeik earlier, he is this fascinating Kyrgyz lawyer who is daily on the news and who leads court cases against the government for the lack of transparency in budgets and allocation of funds. He works with MHS as well.

He came last week to DC for a meeting with the International Budget Project (IBP) and this week to New York City for meetings with the Human Rights Watch.

Meanwhile, as I am continuing work for MHS as of New York, I met with Nurbeik to show him the progress that has been made on the presentation I am preparing for MHS.

Together we discussed several issues related to the presentation and he provided me with updates to include. We will continue meetings today and Wednesday.

MHS will use this presentation to advocate for its causes, mainly the budget monitoring program, on the World Mental Health Day on October 10, 2008.

Maria is a Researcher for Europe and Central Asia at the Human Rights Watch in New York City.

All right then, later :)

[ standstill ]

Joe is across the Atlantic now. I'm still here on dry ground. Making a list of things to do while I still can but, sadly, there's just not enough time in the day. Projects, in my opinion, are somewhat at a standstill (not drupal site - fellows get to call 99% of the shots on that one). I've been waiting for confirmations, answers, and materials from internal and external sources for a few days now. it started off a bit frustrating to very frustrating. However, I've dealt with small-teams of grassroots and non-profits before - this type of break in the progression is typical. I was hoping it wouldn't last as long as it has but I've managed to do some other small tasks while in the office. We were hoping to launch some of the near-to-finalized items before I leave, but my gut tells me with the continuation of slow responses and actions, it's not possible.

While I couldn't eat what was braai-ing, looks like Pefo knew what she was doing.

I really enjoy having "Mo" as a roommate. With Mauriello gone, it's just the two of us in this house on top of the hill. He's given me a very youthful but scared perspective on the South African LGBTI community - particularly along the lines of a younger-generation battling with the fears of "coming out" and the public risk of being proactive in the gay and lesbian civil rights movement. We sat in my bedroom last night talking about what he has seen, what he has heard, what's working forward and backward, and lastly a personal outlook on the country and his future. Some individual video interviews were not conducted in the office because of the very fears he has - about being "discovered." I respect this decision.

Last day with MHS

On the last day of my fellowship, the whole team of Mental Health and Society went on a picninc to fascinating Ala-Archa Mountains.
Below is Aidar with one of the 5 watermelons :)


Below: Andrey and Maral,,,

Gladly (for me) the food did not include lamb or lamb's eye and that's because "there is no money for lamb!" Instead we had potatoes, vegetables, canned fish, bread, chicken and very good sweets!
Sophia cannot possibly be my daughter unless I have a child with a blond blond blond German,,, she's the lovely baby daughter of Lilia and Michael who work with the Budget Monitoring Program at MHS.
I was offered a very nice bouquet from the Self-Help Group with whom I worked (the self-help patients). Thank you Mental Health and Society for a fabulous and unforgettable work/experience during six weeks in Kyrgyzstan!


My buddies,,, (below)

Fabulous mountains behind,

Day 1 back in New York - I loved the food in Kyrgyzstan but I missed the American sugared sugared sugared cupcake :))))

[ hamba kahle, manqoba ]

Mauriello will begin his journey back home this evening. It has been a pleasure experiencing South Africa with him and I'm very grateful he was here. Otherwise, who else would have been my bodyguard? "Hamba kahle, Manqoba." Go well and safely, Joe. See you in New York City.

Jupiter, finally

"That one is Jupiter" Jan is looking at the eastern sky at the only bright dot visible in there.
"Holy Crap it is Jupiter! You can see the moons! Check it out" I'm looking through a telescope the size of Doris.
"Oh, that's Jupiter? That's the biggest one?"
"Do you see it's four moons?"
"Yeah"
We went to the planetarium.
It's a dome at the center is an archaic piece of hardware. Cogs, lens, shafts all dance silently remaking the night sky at the twist of a lever.
Cool

[ behind the scenes diary ]

A fun side-project Joe and I have been doing is documenting ourselves here in Joburg (this is different from the recording of BTM members). It's quite amateur - in other words, very random. It's a compilation of discussions snippets about anything from foods, cockroaches, animals, load shedding to how Mauriello and I managed to live with one another as complete opposites. I'll be sure to show all of you when we get back. Too bad the Joburg team don't know or even own final cut pro. While pieced together in your simple iMovie, it's hilarious.

Stillframe: One week in.

Stillframe: One week in.

Stillframe: Four weeks in.

Stillframe: Four weeks in.

Stillframe: Six weeks in.

Stillframe: Seven weeks in.

In Istanbul Airport again,,,

Catching my flight in one hour - New York, here I come!!!!!
Will upload last Kyrgyzstan news tomorrow,,,,

m

[ braai! ]

Even though I'm not leaving for another week, Behind the Mask is throwing a braai (aka barbeque) as a farewell to the "Bonnie and Clyde" team. They've invited others from neighboring organizations that Joe and I have met. I don't really know how big this thing will be but hopefully there will be something I can eat, since meat is no option for me.

cold

"It's sooo cold" It was cold, for South Africa. probably around 11C thats 51F. "I bet it doesn't get this cold in New York."
"Are you kidding? This is nothing, This would be a pleasant autumn day."
She looked at me like what I was saying was joking. "really?" she said it like she didn't believe me, like I was telling a ridiculous lie.
"What? Yeah this is nothing." How could she not know about the cold? Didn't she know anything about snow? "It'll easily be like, 10C cooler in winter and that is on a good day."
"Oh my god, I don't ever want to go there."
"It's not that cold all the time, it can get really warm in the summer, it can reach over 40C" (100F) She thought about that.

[ from the eye of thuli ]

Status: Busy. (I have my do-not-disturb face on)
Thuli calls the below images: Doris-in-action and Joe-in-action.

Doris taking a photo next to South African Police
(who really aren't taken the protest seriously).

Mauriello never wants people to know he's taken their photo.

lately, maral has been...

Lecturing at the AUCA

Filming Tyéléguen for the MHS documentary

Finalizing work

Visiting the Armenian Diaspora, (Armenian flag behind,,,)

Taking pictures of children while they swim in the 43 oC heat in the fountain right next to the Presidential Palace



Hello everyone,

I have been so busy lately as my fellowship will be completed this Thursday evening - so I have been doing toooooo many things to finish as much as possible while still in Bishkek.

We are all continuing our work for our NGOs from New York, and my first meeting will be on July 14 with Nourbeik our lawyer who will be in DC and NY on meetings with the International Budget Project and the Human Rights Watch.

Nourbeik is a superstar in Kyrgyzstan - he is daily on the news fighting whatever establishment or the Parliament itself on the lack of TRANSPARENCY in the allocation of funds etc etc...

So with him I will complete the presentation I have prepared for MHS that they will use while for their presentation on October 10 at the World Mental Health Day.

Also, I gave a lecture at the American University of Central Asia, advocating for my NGO and trying to have Psychology students work as volunteers or interns at the Outpatient Daycare Center.

I completed the English version of the website - I am waiting for all Russian translations that everyone should prepare and send me so that I post that too.

I filmed a small interview and made a short documentary about it and uploaded on the site - with Kyrgyz Folk music in the background during transitions :)

I did many other things too - like melting in the desert heat - it has been 43 degrees Celius here for the past 3 days - I don't know how much that is in Fahrenheit.

I also visited the Armenian Diaspora and discovered that there are 1200 Armenians in Kyrgyzstan, 600 of whom in Bishkek.

Last but not least, on Thursday the whole of MHS is going on a picnic to the mountains. It is in 'my honor' :)))) (around 40 people)
I have been told that the guest of honor in Kyrgyzstan gets to eat the eye of the lamb after it is 'cooked'?!?!?!?!!?

I highly appreciate this, but I am not eating no eye, ok? I am not eating no lamb's eye.

I have been also told that the lamb's eye is only given to 'male' guests of honor - I hope that will be the case.

:))))))

Back to Alex

Doris and I took our second trip into Alexandra, famously one of the poorest townships in Johannesburg. Since it was first settled over 30 years ago it has been the place immigrants end up upon arriving. We left the car to explored the market:



"what's this?"
"It's a rock"
That was an obvious answer of course it was a rock, but why would anyone buy a rock? And that question begs the other: why would anyone sell a rock?
"But what do you do with it?"
"...eat it, some people eat it."
"...oh"
The boy behind the counter walked away at that point.
There was a table with rows and rows of these rocks. They were soft and chalky looking, they had a light brown coloring.
I moved on and wandered into a shop. There I bought a bag to carry all the crap I had purchased over my seven weeks here in South Africa. It was a small plaid bag, it made Doris laugh.
"It's a girls bag, it's a girls..." when Doris says something she finds funny she says it almost twice; it's endearing.
"well it's the only one I like. Plus it says South Africa on it... Besides some of the sexiest men are androgynous, look at Prince."
She shrugged.
I walked out of the store and past several more rock displays, I decided I would buy one. I asked the women behind the table how much one was, she looked at me like I was stupid then replied "1 rand"
"I'll take one"
She laughed.
"What? what are these things?"
"They are rocks."
yes, apparently "...What are they for"
"...some people eat them."
this was annoying "Well, who eats them? and why?"
she blushed at the question and turned to Patrick and started explaining in Zulu or Xhosa; Patrick understands neither.
Patrick looked at me and gave a small shrug.
"what?"
"it's for women."
I got the idea that maybe the rocks purpose was something that was embarrassing to say to a man that you didn't know "Can you tell her?" I pointed to Doris. She only continued to blush.
"well then I'll give it to a women."
She found that really funny and giggled. I handed her a rand and she put the rock in a bag while calling over to her friend in whatever language; they both laughed. The other women leaned over to get a better look at me, she looked at me, then my plaid bag and then back at me. I didn't feel as silly as I probably should have.

[ cleaning up dirty design ]

New challenge: Re-edit and re-design a 35-40-page Annual News Magazine in 1.5 weeks.
Behind the Mask needs to quickly reproduce this publication and are taking advantage of the time that Joe and I have left here. This piece was designed by outside sources and the final result was completely unacceptable. And so, it's been passed down to us to clean up the mess. Already it's a headache, I just hope that by the end we're still alive. Here's a video of yesterday's Soweto Gay Pride March: Vimeo !t.

[ mountains, horses, gay pride ]

Click Above for Saturday Photos in Magaliesberg + Hartbeespoort Dam.

Click Above for Sunday Photos in Bela Bela and Mabula.

Click Above for Monday and Soweto Gay Pride March.

{loose ends}

Im tying up some loose ends, I'm scheduled to leave tomorrow nite. Not prepared for the long flight. As for the loose ends. We're in africa, and africa has its own schedule, we get so spoiled in the west, especially with bandwidth!!!!!! Even our bad pizza is still pretty good. I'm going over the newsletter we designed, teaching Dedan the rudimentary procedures to get the newsletter out, designing, building mailing list, etc. The set up needs to be more self-sustainable, so it can be used by untrained designers. We developed a template for Dedan to develop print materials in Indesign, which we went over as well. Unfortunately, we didn't get all the cleanup done on the website, untangling a Dreamweaver document is an exercise in futility sometimes. For a application that is supposed to help, it tends to confuse the matter sometimes. I've revised and digitized a couple of logos for PCAU, which is the hospice agency in Uganda.  I've developed and built visual identities for PCAU and PCAZ, another hospice agency in Zambia. Overall I feel I didn't really scratch the surface of the work needed. I'll be able to support remotely, on the newsletter, but really the website needs a tune up and restructuring. APCA want to develop a solid database system that is pretty in depth, and integrate that with a intranet. I guess I have to live with what I've accomplished so far. 

Welcome to South Africa.

It's been raining all weekend!

I'm working on initial design concepts for the website and finalizing newsletter templates this week. I was hoping to get the new site up and live before I leave, but I'm running into some delays.

The PA to the CEO keeps telling me, "This is not America. Welcome to South Africa."

I wish I had some exciting updates for you but it's much of the same. I'm currently working on digitizing a map.

Are you all getting ready to head back to New York, I wonder? I'm here for 3 more weeks and I'm getting a bit anxious because there are some serious personnel issues here. "Welcome to South Africa."

Pride March in Soweto

Soweto is an amazing place, it is the epitome of urban sprawl. Miles and miles of neighborhood. It all looks basically the same but every detail is all alive with color and activity. The close quarters can spark tension, last year on this date Sizakele Sigasa and Salome Masooa, vocal LGBTI activists and open lesbian couple, were brutally murdered. The killers have yet to been brought to justice. LGBTI organizations in Johannesburg held a march to raise awareness about the issue of hate crimes.

This was my first experience with any kind of group demonstration, it was a unique experience. Below are some video and images from the experience.

Safari!!

A view from the horse.

I rode on a horse next to a rhino, it was a white rhino. She was about 6 meters away from me, we knew it was a she by her poop (no kidding). My horse's name was bonero. He was a free spirt, all-be-it a tamed one. While all the other horses remained in line, Bonero would break the line and walk along side or go off into bushes and then cut back into line closer to the front. I would pet him when he did this.

White Rhinos


Dorris on the horse in front of me. Her horses name was Bonita, I think.


Some Gazelles.


Ladies just leave their "leavings" males role around in it the help spread the scent... nice.

Hartbeespoort dam; damn coasters

from: Pbase http://www.pbase.com/michaelmccloskey/image/65770001

So we went to check out this dam. We took the rented car, the drive was cool, the views from the highway were amazing the music from the radio was African folk and we were having fun.

The road over the dam is one lane, there is a light, one direction passes at a time and you end up with a long wait. Over the fifty years of the dams existence the locals have grow wise to this fact and have set up on either side to pray on the waiting tourists, I was one of the waiting tourists. At his point in the trip I had 200R rand in my pocket (just over $20), that's it, I didn't even have money in the bank. So this guy approaches my open window holding a wooden cylinder and asks me to take it from him and open it, "wait till you see what is inside!"

I told him "no thank you, I know what your trying to do, your trying to get that thing into my hands because that makes the sale so much easier." I than tried to ignore him, but I was kind of intrigued. What was in that cylinder? I thought this even though I knew, some how, that the contents was most likely coasters. I don't know why I thought this but I did. He wouldn't leave so finally I said, "If you want me to see what's inside why don't you open it yourself?" I quickly followed with "but you might as well move on because your wasting your time." So he opened it and low and behold, coasters. He said they could be mine for 350R. "Ha" I thought, I don't have 350R so he's stuck. We haggled for a while over this thing that I didn't want and I eventually talked him down to 200R, even though I had no desire to actually own what this guy was selling. Finally he threw in small bowl and I took the bait. I was the dooped owner of a little wooden bowl and a cylinder full of coasters. I also had spent my very last dime. Damn dam.

Let's drive to durban!

We went out on our first day with the car.
We went to some clubs, and coffee.
At the end of the night the car was packed.
Doris was sitting on laps, Apinda, Peepho, and Lasego where sitting on the seat underneithe her, Mongezi was in the front seat; we past a sign on the highway "Durban (arrow)" and peepho said "let's go to Durban!!" She was serious.
Durban is a beach town on the Indian ocean, Doris and I talked about going there. It's a 600km drive (300 something miles) it's far, it takes about 7 hours by car.
I am always up for anything so I had to at least consider the proposition, and this made Doris very nervous. It was 2AM and her head was kind of pressed sideways against the cars headliner.
In the end reason and Doris won out and we went home, but it was a fun idea for a moment.

{Final projects, Friday}

Today and yesterday I spent revising several logos for another of the hospice agencies here at APCA. The Palliative Care Association of Uganda  needed a revision to the identity and development of their visual guidelines. I've also been involved with the clean up of our site, a major project considering some technical issues. With Joe's advice, (generally a nice guy for those who don't know), I think we're going to try to use some google analytics on the site to help analyze the visitors, etc. Thanks Joe!

Interview with Stanley

I never really understood what gay pride meant until we interviewed Stanley. Stanley has worked at BTM since the beginning. He started as the house keeper and is now the webmaster. I never put much thought into the concept of Gay Pride. I figured it was something to rally around but I never thought about the reason or meaning. I realized by talking with Stanley that growing up as a "closeted gay person" in a community that doesn't except sexual differences is a source of intense shame. It is natural for a homosexual to be a homosexual; imagine being ashamed of something that is natural to you. It's heart breaking. That is why pride is so important; to move beyond acceptance of yourself to a place where you can be proud of who you are. Acceptance without pride still leaves room for shame. Shame is a source of fear and everyone should be able to lead a life without fear. I get it now.

Working with stanley

I have been spending time training Stanley. He has some experience with the web and is not a beginner which makes my job easier.
This is my plan, it's a four stage process... I'll let you know how it goes.
1. I plan to start with basic and general "internet principals": giving him an understanding of the technologies being used in the site.
2. Then I'll give him some very basic HTML training (even with the sites built in text editor, it's all HTML underneath and since HTML is so easily understood with proper instruction he might as well know it.)
3. Then I'll get him oriented with Drupal and how it works (I've already given him some documentation to look over I am basically going to outline what that documentation covers so he understands how the system works)
4. Finally I am going to go over the basics of how the BTM site works... (this is by far the most crutial portion as it is what he will be working with from day to day. If he understands nothing but this last section then he'll be fine. He will have a better foundation of understanding if he has that other stuff floating around in his head first)
I plan on doing this over the course of 4 days. Starting today. I'll do the last leason on Monday and let him play with the system for the rest of the week while I'm still here.

Fire in South Africa

Fire doesn't seem to be a big deal in south africa.
I mean if there is a fire blazing out in a public place, nobody seems to care.
Barely anyone even takes notice.


People start fires in cans all over the place, this one's in Alexandra


I saw this one in a parking lot


and this one in a park

I've seen others but I was used to seeing fires so I stopped taking pictures